HurriedPatience

I start this blog with a deep breath and sniffles from having watched Unplanned. Even though I mention a title/story/movie about the inside of an abortion clinic, I don't want you to think this is leading to that. This is a deeper story in my pregnancy announcement and journey posts, and having seen the hard nature of seeing other peoples.  If you take a stroll through my 2017 social media, you would probably not realize I was pregnant that year, other than four photos: one from a pastors wife gathering in September, two at Halloween events, and the one from my baby shower in December. I actually feel like I took VERY few photos other than those even for non social media posting.  John and I got married in 2009. We had a plan: graduate college, get a puppy and potty train it, and then we would be ready to have a kid. We were sophomores in college when we got married and per advice of those around us felt like we wanted to take some years (maybe 3) to get to know each other as ...

I would be remiss if I allowed Cesarean Awareness month pass by without reflecting on mine through writing. I had always wanted to have children. I did not want a c-section. I did not want to have a medicated birth. Heck! I didn't really even want to have my child in a hospital. But all of that changed the day that I found out I was pregnant and had a bicornuate {heart shaped/double sided/split} uterus.  I hear mamas stories of going into labor and it makes me tear up a bit that I didn't get that opportunity. I hear stories of mamas going back and forth to the hospital with false alarms, and feel I missed out on an experience. But at 20 weeks due to my condition, my doctor and I had come to the consensus that a c section was going to be the safest manner for baby and mama but it wasn't going to stop my doctor from even checking the babys position the morning of my delivery.  I find that Satan tries his hardest to pull heart strings and make you feel inadequate....

If you are a follower of my blog, you may remember a little posty poo I wrote back in April titled, " Life: Adoption, Foster Care and Us " (if not check it out) which was the first time I was sharing publicly that I was okay if we never had biological children and a peek into my giant bleeding heart for foster and adoption. Well little did I know that only one month later I would be sitting in a doctor's office being told, " Congratulations, no antibiotics for you- you are pregnant. Ecclesiastes 3:1, "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens." Why do I ever think I know what God is planning and timing is for my life? God continues to remind this planner obsessed girl that His clock knows better than mine. I have had to lean on that more than anything 8 months after that blog. My husband and I are still praying/seeking/interviewing for guidance on where God has laid out for us next in ministry, and currently will ...